They are one of the most unpleasant side effects of pregnancy. They can shatter your self esteem. They seem to be endless and never stop coming! No, I’m not talking about stretch marks. I’m talking about the rude comments and snide remarks that people (usually little old ladies and foreigners) make to pregnant women. Before I got pregnant, I never had anyone insult me to my face (outside of elementary and middle school, that is). I was under the delusion that adults could treat each other with respect and dignity. I was also under the impression that it is never okay to mention a woman’s weight. Apparently, common courtesy goes out the window when it comes to pregnant women.
While I was pregnant with Daphne, the rude remarks did not stop. I worked in a retail store, so I was interacting with people on a daily basis. It seemed like every other person who came in asked me when I was due. Most people were shocked when I told them. “But that is so far away! You are so huge!” they usually said. Sometimes they asked me if I was sure that the doctor had the due date correct. Or if I had gestational diabetes. I measured right on track the entire pregnancy, and I was healthy as a horse, thank you very much. I wanted to curb-stomp the next person who asked me if I was going to have twins. That question got old fast. The comment that was especially pleasant was the one where a lady told me that her daughter-in-law wasn’t nearly as huge as I was when she gave birth to twins at full term. I was a mere 30 weeks at the time. I wanted to sock her. When I was 35 weeks, a woman came into the store, took one look at me and said, “Holy cow! How pregnant are you?” I said, “Extremely, last I checked.” She then went on to express her surprise that I was so huge, that I wasn’t carrying twins, and that the doctors definitely did not have my due date wrong. I had people refer to me as “Chubby.” I had women tell me that I would have serious problems losing “all that baby weight.” I only gained 18 pounds.
I don’t understand why people feel the need to insult pregnant women. A woman is most vulnerable and insecure while she is pregnant due to the insane amounts of hormones and body changes. There should be some unspoken rule that only positive remarks should be made to those who are with child. Why can’t people see the positive in it instead of making a pregnant woman feel like crap? Whenever I see a pregnant woman, I make it a point to ask her how far along she is, if it is a boy or girl, and then I tell her how beautiful she looks. After all, creating life is such a beautiful thing.
What rude comments did you get while you were pregnant? Share your stories!
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When I was pregnant I too worked in retail, and i remember hearing some of those comments “are you sure there arent 2 babies in there?” … yes lady ive only been to the dr about 30 times so far… some people have no idea, or they just lack that sensor that says “don’t be rude, keep your comment to yourself”
Some people are just awful sometimes, aren’t they? I am so glad that I am done with work now! I was sick and tired of hearing the rude comments every day. No filter at all!
From my brother: “Your baby is gonna be big huh?” Me “no baby is right on track average weight”. Brother: “Oh so your just really fat”.
my biggest issue was with people coming up to me rubbing my belly! that bugged me to no end because i dont like being touched on a regular not pregnant day so what makes people think pregnant women want foreign hands all over them? also people rubbing and telling my son to come out and trying to shake my belly to wake him up…really?
Wow, they really shook your belly? Seriously? That would make me so mad!
I’m 36 weeks and I get the twins comments from people all the time. I am so sick of it. I ventured out of the house to go shopping at one place today and had two total strangers tell me how huge I am and ask me if I’m having twins.
Isn’t it horrible? I got that ALL THE TIME during my last pregnancy. Thankfully, no one has asked me yet if I am having twins! Then again, I’m only 23 weeks, so I am sure someone will have asked me by the time I’m full term. Have you had your baby yet?
I’m tall and never been super skinny. Today I met a friend of my parents at the mall and he said “You just keep growing, don’t you? In all directions- Haha”.
This has been the worst so far- I’m conscious about my weight but I understand its both stupid and useless to try and diet while I’m pregnant and I know I will lose it once the baby is out. I tried to come up with something witty but only came up with “I’m 6 months pregnant so as the baby is growing so am I”.
People need to learn to shut their mouths! Or just say, “you look great!” Next time, say “I’m pregnant, what’s your excuse?!?”